Hospitals, headaches and another day.

It's been a hell of a week so far and this is only my second day of class. Thank god I only have one more day after this. I have had the hardest time focusing these last few weeks. I haven't been to bed before 4am once this week. The issue isn't that I feel tired or anything really. I've just been struggling. When I was swimming yesterday, I couldn't help but feel so small. I got beat by the low tide. Absolutely pounded. There were two lessons I drew from the experience, but I can't decide which is right. Either I am meant to feel helpless, to know that I can't change the tide or it was just some sort of huge wake up call; as if God were trying to beat me into getting it together.

Last weekend, Jennifer and I went to Fuck Yeah Fest 5. It was pretty great but I was completely disappointed to have missed Off With Their Heads. I've only recently been introduced to their music, but I know it's for me. It's anthemic, it's depressing and the singer sounds like a pirate. Punk photographer Mark Beemer (also founder of the Syrentha Savio Endowment) is from Minneapolis, as is Off With Their Heads. He always described Minnesota punk as being so far behind all other major scenes, except for Dillinger Four. It was never a place I wanted to even think about. After hearing Off With Their Heads' first EP Hospitals, I knew that I really wanted to be there, just to be closer to the places they sing about.

The first song on the EP, "Die Today," has been attached above. The video is Off With Their Heads playing live at the Triple Rock, the club co-owned by Dillinger Four. "I'm not gonna go to work today/I wanna feel the sun shine on my face/and pretend like everything's okay/I won't let anything get to me/.../I just wanna fucking cry today/cause nothing ever goes my way/I spent all my money on cocaine/and I still have rent and bills to pay/everyone's so fucking pissed at me/the reasons why are so obvious to see/I don't care about anyone when the dealers are paid and gone and the pain is relieved/I'll tie it around my neck and kick the chair out with my legs/because I wanna fucking die today!" I haven't heard anything this startling and beautiful in a long time from a punk band. In short, I've seen the light.

Sometimes, I have to be beat into remembering that life isn't so bad. Sometimes life does suck us dry. Sometimes headaches make you want to die. Sometimes, something beautiful happens. It doesn't happen that often, but songs like "Die Today" make the wait worth it.

Off With Their Heads - Hospitals