Hospitals, headaches and another day.

It's been a hell of a week so far and this is only my second day of class. Thank god I only have one more day after this. I have had the hardest time focusing these last few weeks. I haven't been to bed before 4am once this week. The issue isn't that I feel tired or anything really. I've just been struggling. When I was swimming yesterday, I couldn't help but feel so small. I got beat by the low tide. Absolutely pounded. There were two lessons I drew from the experience, but I can't decide which is right. Either I am meant to feel helpless, to know that I can't change the tide or it was just some sort of huge wake up call; as if God were trying to beat me into getting it together.

Last weekend, Jennifer and I went to Fuck Yeah Fest 5. It was pretty great but I was completely disappointed to have missed Off With Their Heads. I've only recently been introduced to their music, but I know it's for me. It's anthemic, it's depressing and the singer sounds like a pirate. Punk photographer Mark Beemer (also founder of the Syrentha Savio Endowment) is from Minneapolis, as is Off With Their Heads. He always described Minnesota punk as being so far behind all other major scenes, except for Dillinger Four. It was never a place I wanted to even think about. After hearing Off With Their Heads' first EP Hospitals, I knew that I really wanted to be there, just to be closer to the places they sing about.

The first song on the EP, "Die Today," has been attached above. The video is Off With Their Heads playing live at the Triple Rock, the club co-owned by Dillinger Four. "I'm not gonna go to work today/I wanna feel the sun shine on my face/and pretend like everything's okay/I won't let anything get to me/.../I just wanna fucking cry today/cause nothing ever goes my way/I spent all my money on cocaine/and I still have rent and bills to pay/everyone's so fucking pissed at me/the reasons why are so obvious to see/I don't care about anyone when the dealers are paid and gone and the pain is relieved/I'll tie it around my neck and kick the chair out with my legs/because I wanna fucking die today!" I haven't heard anything this startling and beautiful in a long time from a punk band. In short, I've seen the light.

Sometimes, I have to be beat into remembering that life isn't so bad. Sometimes life does suck us dry. Sometimes headaches make you want to die. Sometimes, something beautiful happens. It doesn't happen that often, but songs like "Die Today" make the wait worth it.

Off With Their Heads - Hospitals

Two-thirds of the way through the year and where are we?

Today is September 1 and there are 121 days left in the year. Eight full months have passed and that leaves me wondering where we are. This is convention season and it seems a good time for a state of the union, of sorts.

As pictured above, the Autumnal Equinox is on the way, which means days are going to get shorter. It seemed like the days were so insanely long during the summer. I really love late sunsets, but I love when it starts to get really dark at night. Fall nights are wonderful times for fall albums. There weren't any particularly stand-out Summer albums, which means that fall is going to be wonderful. There are a few already (see below):


Andrew Jackson Jihad - Only God Can Judge Me
Sean and Ben have consistently put out some of the most astonishingly honest, smart music and they keep the train moving with this EP. As Conway says, they're able to say all the things we wish we could say. "Growing Up" is one of the best songs this year, for sure.


Beck - Modern Guilt
Of course, I have my problems with this album, but I think it definitely has a place on this list. It is immaculately produced by Danger Mouse, who has redeemed himself from the job he did on the Black Keys last album. Beck's songwriting has changed so much over the years; some of it worked and some of it didn't. I won't mention any era in specific, but this album is definitely a comeback. It's a very svelte album (10 tracks, 31 minutes) and it not only has spunk, but it has that elder statesman feel to it, which makes it that much better.


Okkervil River - The Stand-Ins
As I mentioned last year, Will Sheff is one of the new, great American songwriters. He put the first part of the two disc set out last year (The Stage Names) and it was wonderful. The Stand-Ins is a very understated release comparatively, however that isn't to say that it's any better or worse than The Stage Names. Of course, the first two songs resonate the most with me because they sound like Smiths and Morrissey songs respectively and "Pop Lie" has that spark that every great Okkervil River song has. All in all, this is a wonderful fall album that's great to walk down the beach thinking of.


Final Fantasy - Plays to Please/Spectrum, 14th Century
Straight talk time: Owen Pallett is one of the most interesting musicians of our time. It seems ridiculous to praise individuals like Sheff and Pallett, however these EPs are the proof. There were already two great Final Fantasy full length releases (Has A Good Home and He Poos Clouds) and several 7"s/compilation tracks that absolutely rule and these EPs just put the cherry on top. The first Arcade Fire album was Pallett's initiation and he's only improved his individual songwriting since then. The Plays to Please EP is a tribute to Alex Lukashevsky of Deep Dark United and employs a 35 piece orchestra that contains Andrew Bird. What else do you need to know? The second EP is equally genius as it is made up of fake field recordings with members of Beirut. "Blue Imelda," the second song on the Spectrum EP is definitely going to make it to the top of my year end list. Amazingly gorgeous.


Annie - Don't Stop
I really don't know what to say about this album quite yet, although I've listened to it once and I know already that it's the best straightforward pop album this year. It's totally danceable and has great hooks. It's a great fall album because of its Norwegian roots. Scandinavian pop has this wonderful dark quality to it, no matter how sugary the hooks are, just because of the nature of Scandinavia.


Hellsongs - Hymns in the Key of 666
Now, right off the bat, this isn't the most appealing album, and I still have my issues with it, however it is a very well crafted album. Hellsongs is a collective out of Sweden that claims to be a "loungemetal" act. Basically, they do folk-pop covers of metal classics. This edition contains versions of "We're Not Gonna Take It," "Run To The Hills," and a wonderful cover of Slayer's "Seasons in the Abyss." These covers are wonderfully fall-friendly because of how gentle they are.


Brian Wilson - That Lucky Old Sun
Why is this a fall album? Well, for God's sake, this album is being released in a few weeks. Of course, I know it's meant to be a summer album, just by the nature of it being a Brian Wilson album, but the album is a sort of retelling of the Beach Boys story. Again, why is this a fall album? This retelling of the Beach Boys story, along with the fact that Brian Wilson doesn't do much "music" anymore, signals the "end of the summer," if you catch my drift. All in all, "Southern California" is one of those songs that just screams classic album closer.


Algernon Cadwallader - Some Kind of Cadwallader
This album brings back fond memories of the fall of senior year of high school. I had just delved deeper into the world of the mid-1990s Midwest and discovered the world of Kinsella. Cap'n Jazz and Braid quickly became two of my favorite bands. Algernon Cadwallader has put out one of the most Midwest inspired albums of the last five years; even the vocals sound like a Kinsella. Algernon Cadwallader is playing at the Hickey Underworld on November 16 and I am so completely excited.


Paint it Black - New Lexicon
Dr. Dan has put out another genius album. That's like five in five years or something. I was reminded of what a wonderful dude he is the other night when I got to hug him. He had just gotten off stage from performing one of the most intensely negative Paint it Black sets and he was still dripping sweat, but he was gracious enough to stop and talk for a minute. Paint it Black has been slowly wading in the water towards melody and this is their most melodic album yet. Basically, I just can't get enough.

"Rather Be Dead" and wishing for change

Day three of school just beginnning and I've been meditating on the phrase "Rather Be Dead," just like the Refused song. I'm sitting in class, thinking about it all day. I figure something can't be healthy, however it forces me into a certain place where all I want to listen to is late 90s/early oughts post-post-hardcore or post-emocore/screamo or whatever you like to call it. My professor is talking about dairy farmers and how they make the cows produce more milk by forcing them to listen to music. She's totally a Chinese lady who lives in Monterey Park. She said, "Maybe some of you grow up in rock and roll... maybe that relax you."

I've really changed over the last few years. I used to fall asleep listening to Poison the Well's The Opposite of December. I actually used to relax listening to "A Wish for Wings That Work." These days, I listen to music that normal people listen to, but there's still some part of me that loves that stuff.

"Rather Be Dead" is probably where this movement started. Refused put out two wonderful albums: Songs to Fan the Flame of Discontent and The Shape of Punk To Come: A Chimerical Bombation in 12 Bursts. These albums are often cited as the heirs to the throne that The Nation of Ulysses left as well as the last great punk albums of the century. The Shape of Punk to Come was released in 1998 and started a revolution that made its way to the United States in the early 2000s. Bands didn't just want to be brutish hardcore dudes anymore; they wanted to be complex and have influences that came before 1982.

Curl Up and Die was one of the first metalcore bands in this era. They had math parts and breakdowns and all the formulaic nonsense, but they referenced Starship Troopers and had wonderfully perplexing parts in their songs that confused your everyday FSU dude. Their first EP called The Only Good Bug is a Dead Bug came out in 2000 and wasn't completely revolutionary, but was a great first release.

In 2004, DC band A Day in Black and White put out one of my favorite EPs in the genre to date called My Heroes Have Always Killed Cowboys. The sound is beyond raw in a way that you wouldn't imagine. I've even imagined that the sound of these recordings was a step up on Albini, however that is just plain ridiculous.

Following in Albini's mean sounding guitar steps, OXES put out an eponymous EP in 2005 that is intended to blow minds and eardrums. Basically, all you need to know is contained in the cover.

2005 saw the release of the last Cave In album, Perfect Pitch Black. This was a perfect swan song for a band that has had so many different "sounds" in so few years. This album brings their late 90s-Converge-copycat-Boston sound forward and merges it perfectly with their space rock/Failure/Catherine Wheel sound and even bits of their MCA era-modern rock radio aspirational hooks. The first song, "The World Is In Your Way" is a great example of this.

I've grown tired of this. I was thinking about posting like 25+ albums, but you'll just have to wait. None of you will download any of these anyways.

I guess I've had time this week to reflect on what's changed and what's the same. It leaves me feeling like I need to change something. I don't know what it is yet, but if someone figures it out, let me know.

The Summer Ends

I don't quite understand myself. I'm tired out of my mind, and yet, I'm not ready to sleep. Tomorrow is my first day of class for the semester and I am looking forward to listening to this song (see embedded video) while walking to class way more than anything else about the first day of school.



As a matter of fact, I will be listening to that song pretty much all day tomorrow.



Yes, summer is about as over as the 90s. Side note: can you believe this song came out in 1997 and not 1993?

Night terrors

Friends, this is one of the very first times there is no passionate optimism. I haven't been sleeping well and I feel like I'm sleep-blogging right now. I'm in a very gray patch in my life. I just woke up from a very heavy sleep... I think. I'd only been asleep for about two and a half hours and I was having a terrible dream. I don't remember what it was about, but thank God I was woken up by a text from Jennifer. I guess it didn't help that I fell asleep listening to Grace (see above).

If you haven't figured it out, it's been a rough summer. I think that tonight was where everything sort of went overboard. I realize now that I'm different than before. I still don't know the extent really, but I'm definitely more easily tired and I'm burned out. I'm much more sad. I spent half an hour crying in the bathtub tonight. I don't really know why.

I'm just hoping that I don't become one of those people with extreme, uncontrollable night terrors. That would suck.

A Summer of Discovery, Disappointment and Discombobulation (Things to watch out for)

About a week ago, I tried to start the "post your favorite album from each year since you've been born" meme on my blog, however I realized that if you looked at my list, you'd think I was a total tool. I don't fully disagree, however, I don't feel strongly enough about any one album to put myself out there in that way. I got up to about 1992 and I realized that nearly every single album was somewhere on Pitchfork's top 100 of whatever decade and immediately, I was disappointed in myself for my lack of creativity. Every other blog that posted the same thing tried to make themselves look a little more interesting than they actually were, entering late-era Neil Young, A Tribe Called Quest or obscure west coast hip-hop. Friends, that is not me. I will have you know that I included Social Distortion's self-titled masterpiece on my list.

Anyhow, I've been burned out on a lot of things for a long time. While I was at work on Friday, I finally took the time to update my iPod (in part). I put on albums that I've acquired over the past few weeks and just haven't had the time to listen to. Some of them were not as good as I had hoped (the new albums by The Walkmen, Lucky Dragons, High Places), however there were some wonderful discoveries as well. Here are a few:



Titus Andronicus - The Airing of Grievances
I have so many wonderful comparisons/RIYL laden language for this one, it'll make you sick. Jeff Enzor said that this was like Ted Leo minus about 15 years. I feel like this is the Walkmen album that all the Bows+Arrows fans deserve, or at least represents the path the Walkmen could have walked if they weren't fed a Steady Diet of Nothing, rather consuming Rum, Sodomy and the Lash. It's as if 17 year old versions of Canada's Fucked Up were raised in New Jersey, only listening to what the rest of New Jersey listens to (anything by the Boss). It's actually not out of place on the shelf next to the Desaparecidos album from a few years ago; energetic and wild, lo-fi as it can be and sung by a Conor-a-like. Anyways, it's wonderful and the album is a real crowd pleaser.



Ponytail - Ice Cream Spiritual
This band comes from Baltimore and that's nearly all you need to know, considering the fact that Baltimore has been putting out some of the best new music in the last few years (see also: Whartscape festival). The band is a bunch of weird looking kids that listened too a few too many Japanese noise albums. They make joyful, experimental, razor sharp guitar songs that are screamed over with non-sensical syllables.



The Three O'Clock - Sixteen Tambourines
Unfortunately, I don't have a working link for this one, but if anyone wants it, I am more than willing to upload it. This is truly the pride of Carson, CA. The kid you see playing bass and singing was from Carson, but now resides in San Pedro (duh) and this is possibly the best discovery I've had in a while. Jennifer kept telling me about this band that I'd like, but I was totally turned off by the "Paisley Underground" tag. I never really got into The Who or the Velvet Underground, so what the hell did that mean to me? Nothing. That was until I saw the attached video. The Three O'Clock wasn't about anything more than hooks. If someone had told me that before, I would have been all over that like Justin Conway on the Internet.

MUXTAPE #3: je suis nasty

MUXTAPE

There are so many things in life I've missed out on. Music is an endless journey of discovery and very recently, I've discovered that I've been missing out on real post-punk and post-hardcore.

1. The Wedding Present - "Dalliance (Seamonsters)"
Steve Albini guiding one of England's most beloved bands through what would become their first major album. 1991 was an important year for music in the same way that 1979 and 1984 were for their respective decades. David Gedge wrote one of the best "side one track ones" I've heard recently.

2. Mission of Burma - "That's When I Reach for my Revolver (Signals, Calls and Marches reissue)"
Whenever people would talk about Mission of Burma, I thought they were making fun of me with their (more) elitist references.
Little did I know that people that listen to Mission of Burma weren't messing around. I'd always heard that Mission of Burma was "difficult" and that their music wasn't just for anyone; in actuality, it isn't that difficult and is one of the cornerstones for much of the music I listen to today.

3. Sunny Day Real Estate - "Seven (Diary)"
This is one of the first really angular songs I ever encountered at the tender young age of 14. I heard it and had no idea who it was. Soon after, I learned of the magic of Jeremy Enigk through the Emogame and found out just how amazing Diary was. It is now one of my favorite Seattle albums. Sunny Day Real Estate is totally the Seattle Fugazi.

4. Fugazi - "Brendan #1 (Repeater +3)"
Fugazi just fits so well, right after talking about a fake Fugazi. Before Repeater, I'd never heard drums so intense and yet so restrained. This song is the perfect example of this.

5. The Nation of Ulysses - "The Sound of Young America (13-Point Program to Destroy America)"
Svenonius is a genius. Without him, there would be no Refused and I would have no manifesto. I love the idea of rebellion through obedience.

6. Geno - "Act 1 (Free DVDS)"
Brzezicki is a genius. Free DVDS was wonderful and it's only a matter of time before he blows my mind again. The way this is recorded is pretty great; the guitar sounds so sparse and is perfect.

7. Boris - "となりのサターン (SMILE)"
This little gem is directly in the middle of the new Boris album and it took me a long time to get to it. Usually, with a Boris album, I'll get so stoked on the first two songs that I won't get past them. SMILE is a great example of this. "メッセージ" and "BUZZ-IN" are two brain rattling opening tracks. The drums in the verses, set behind the guitar playing the keyboard parts, are beautiful, but then Boris makes you remember why you liked them in the first place.

8. Pink & Brown - "Je Suis Nasty (Final Foods)"
I always thought of Pink & Brown as some sort of ripoff Lightning Bolt and it's not hard to draw comparisons, but they are genius in their own way.

9. Hella - "Welcome to the Jungle Baby, Your gonna live! (The Devil Isn't Red)"
Old Hella is pretty mind-melting. Get stoked on it.

What Summer 2008 means to me

The last few weeks, I've been floundering, not quite sure what this summer was going to bring. There's usually some sort of determination at the end of the school year to either keep the good spirit going or change things altogether. I really came away from this year with mixed feelings. So many things happened this year and I'm not sure what to do. It was generally a mixed bag all year long, with amazing highs and ridiculous lows. What this has left me was extreme appreciation for this exact moment. I still lose sight of what's going on right now, but I know that the second it really goes wrong, it's because I've strayed too far from living presently.

I've been working for a week now, and it's only going to get more intense as the summer goes on. I'm currently working 4 days a week in the office, two of those being scheduled half days. Both of the "half" days last week, I ended up working full days. The other day is devoted to "catching up" even though it's only Tuesday. I guess I knew that I would need the break because I ended up picking up another job for later in the summer that will involve me working on the weekends. At least I'm getting paid for one of these jobs.

All of this being said, summer 2008 maybe won't be so "great." As of right now, all I can see is stress and more white hair, but I've decided that I can still salvage some of the summer and give it a theme that's worthy of working towards.

I guess there really isn't a name for summer 2008 yet; what I really hope is that I can take shelter somewhere until it's over. I've always had a strange relationship with summer. I've never been particularly active during the summer. I've never had a real "summer job." I've never really done much of anything, but I've never particularly wanted summer to end. This is the first year that I've had real thoughts about wanting it to just be over so I can go back to school, which is just as terrifying because it's my last year. I really don't know where I'm going or what I'm doing after next year is over.

One of the things that I need from this summer is relaxation. I also would like for this summer to be about civility. These things haven't been hallmarks of summers past, so I've decided that it merits a new activity, something that I haven't tried before; this summer, I will be hosting tea parties!

Over the last year, I've become a food fanatic. I'm even a bit snobby sometimes. I've decided that food is something that isn't just for function; it is to be enjoyed. Through this, I've also realized the power of a good sommelier. Pairing a wine with food is an art. This has been a slow discovery for me, beginning with tacos, mariscos and sangria. The nature of the food and the drink changes in combination. I still don't drink actual alcohol, however I've decided to take the idea of the sommelier and apply it to something I'm more comfortable with: teas. Summer is all about refreshing tastes and what's more refreshing than a tall glass of iced tea?

So this summer, expect to see an invitation coming your way. Love you all.

What the world needs now... MUXTAPE #3

edit: this one isn't up yet.



MUXTAPE

The last few weeks, I've gone AWOL from nearly everything in my life. Life really caught up to me and kicked my ass. School is finally over for the year and I don't have much to reflect on this year, as I usually do. I guess it's only Monday of the first week, so I'm not much in the mood for reflection yet.

In my absence, I've been moody. I haven't had much human interaction and that may have been to my detriment, and I've also come out of my "unlimited positivity" mindset, but I've at least tried to make it interesting. Last week, I came across a very interesting download on Sordo. It was marked as "Nirvana - In Utero (Albini version vinyl rip)". I had known that much of In Utero was recorded by Albini, but the vast majority of the better known songs were deemed "radio unfriendly" by Geffen, meaning that someone else had to come in to remix/remaster the songs so that they would be more "people friendly."

When I listened to the full Albini version of In Utero, I realized something that I really hadn't thought about before. The Albini Charm has a lot to do with alienation and alienating people. When you think back to Big Black, Rapeman and Shellac, you think of an abrasive, ironic sense of humor with an "up yours" sound that matched. The more and more I thought about the wider Albini production catalogue, I realized all of the things he's had his hand in (minus Ys and Lift Your Skinny Fists...) have basically had the same spirit or idea driving them. Steve effing Albini doesn't have to be people friendly.

To me, Steve Albini's guitar tone and drum sound are two of the things that set him apart from all the rest of the producers in the world. I don't quite understand how he gets the sounds he does out of those instruments, but he does a wonderful job putting out some of the angriest music of the 90s and the 00s.

Without making you wait any longer, here's Muxtape #3, Albini's Angry Teenage Soundtrack:

1. Nirvana - "All Apologies (demo) (In Utero Albini Version)"
This version is so wonderful. The drums and the bass are so huge, the guitars are beautifully chaotic and the outro is so much better than the album version. Angry 13 year olds everywhere rejoice!

2. Scout Niblett - "Lullaby for Scout in Ten Years (Kidnapped by Neptune)"
For a long time, I didn't quite get it. "Scout Niblett? Who's that? Oh, the girl." That was about as much as I cared. This was the first Scout Niblett song I ever heard and when the distorted guitars came in, I thought that I had never heard something so intense. The transition from the very intimate, small sound to the huge, distorted punch in the face is signature Albini.

3. The Wedding Present - "Suck (Seamonsters remaster)"
David Gedge. Steve Albini. Same room. They just recorded another Wedding Present album together, but this was the original one. Gedge's affinity for melody, coupled with his faux-Ian Curtis vocals and Albini's drums and guitars make for some of the most interesting britpop of the early 90s.

4. Pixies - "Tame (Doolittle)"
Sure, Doolittle had its really beautiful melodic moments, like "Wave of Mutilation" or "Here Comes Your Man," but the really big moments come when Frank Black starts screaming, guitars pounding.

5. Big Black - "Colombian Necktie (Songs About Fucking)"
There's really not much to say here, other than I love the fact that the drummer's name is always credited as "Roland."

6. Shellac - "My Black Ass (At Action Park)"
Same deal here. This is the first Shellac song I heard and all I could think was, "Why does that guitar sound so angry?"

7. Melt-Banana - "Sick Zip Everywhere (Scratch or Stitch)"
I thought that this was one of the most wonderful pairings in all of music production history. Take a Japanese noise band and add one of the noisiest producers in rock and roll? Awesome.

8. PJ Harvey - "50ft Queenie (Rid of Me)"
I never knew much about PJ Harvey beyond the fact that she did amazing work with Nick Cave. This particular album, Rid of Me, was a great example of why Albini draws the best out of his artists. PJ wasn't the angriest grrl on the block until she met him.

9. Jawbreaker - "The Boat Dreams From the Hill (24 Hour Revenge Therapy)"
Here's one of those signature Albini "uncredited" moments. Superchunk also did this. The bands felt like if they credited Albini, his reputation would be damaged because they were too pop for him to produce. Albini did a wonderful thing with this Jawbreaker album in the same vein as his work with The Wedding Present. The raw power and weight of his production coupled with the melodic leanings of Blake Schwarzenbach lead to a beautiful album.

Post #50: Megaposting 2000GREAT!

Here we are, at the end of the academic year and we're sending it up to the spirit in the sky. [/office reference]

Anyhow, I've been here for 49 posts and since I don't actually pay any of you to read my blog, I figured I should give you all a few gifts. How can I do this in a meaningful way that will affect a great deal of you? ALBUM MEGAPOST! As those in the Hickey Underworld would say, happy two thousand great!

These albums are all from my "Best of 2008" list, though it doesn't comprise it fully. They appear in no specific order. Enjoy!


No Age - Nouns


The Magnetic Fields - Distortion


Vampire Weekend - s/t


The Mountain Goats - Heretic Pride


She & Him - Volume One


Jason Anderson - The Hopeful and the Unafraid
note on this as well: July 17 = Harry and the Potters, Jason Anderson, Math the Band at the Troubadour. The tour is called the Unlimited Enthusiasm tour. What else do you need to know? Just be there and support the man who's writing some of the most meaningful music today.